9w 1d....starting to sink in now.

Ok I know I haven't been good with keeping 'up to date' on what is going on, but I honestly have been really sick. And if I'm not sick, I'm really tired.





But I guess I have a bit of updating to do. I had my ultrasound at 7w 1d, and saw the most beautiful and amazing heartbeat that I could have EVER seen. And yes there is just one. It was going at a steady 143 bpm too. I got them to make a cd of all the pictures, even though it looked like a new born mouse (yes I work in a petstore, so thats the best discription) and in some of them it looked like a blob. But in the centre of the blob is on tiny white dot, and thats its heart. I cant stop looking at it. The baby was measuring perfectly to the dates I gave her to.......so it was a quick implanter!



I am still having the spotting, from time to time. No one seems really concerned about it. And I find as time passes, I get less and less concerned too. Dont get me wrong I'm still a stress case about everything ;) I read in my here through Maturnity book that it is normal to have some bleeding up until 40 days past conception.......I'm 48 today and haven't had it for about 4 days now (knock on wood).



I have been really sick. I haven't been able to keep down water or milk......and dont even get me started on food. My dr put me on diclectin, which helps a tiny bit I guess.....Its hard though because I eat something and NEVER want to see it again.....I'm running out of choices very quickly!! Another thing is this horrible taste that I get in my mouth. I cant get rid of it, and it makes me puke too. But its only there sometimes....



I was suspose to have my prenatal physical today, but the dr really didn't do anything. She didn't want to do a pap, because of the spotting. She doesn't seem interested in answering any of my questions.....and I left almost in tears. She also said something about my blood being RH- so I need to get a shot at 24-26 weeks so my body doesn't reject the baby.....That worried me some, because I dont know what that means. I will be looking that up after too.



We were going to wait until 10-12 weeks to tell family but the cat was let outta the bag at our family reunion. Most family knows now, but we haven't told many others yet. Which is getting hard, because I have quite the booda belly already!! I notice co-workers looking at me, but I know they wont ask incase I'm just getting fat. Nothing fits anymore and I had to go buy new clothes (mostly mat clothes) and I love wearing them (not at work) because I actually do look pg.



So all in all things are good. I still feel this is the best thing that has ever happened to me. And will take it again and again, morning sickness and all!



One last thing: I wanted to let anyone reading this know that I honestly believe dreams do come true. I know sometimes it seems so far away and sometimes things seem like forever, but I believe that things all happen for a reason. I always believed that even when my pain from IF was the highest. I never thought the day would come when I got my BFP, and sometimes I still find myself sitting there completely in awe over the fact that I am pregnant. I keep a few others in my prayers all the time, Liz & SR....and I know both your dreams are going to come true too. I am sooo excited for you SR as you sniff away. In a few months you'll be sitting back going over your journey in your head and then be able to smile and rub your belly and know that your little beans are in there too. Its the best feeling ever. And Liz hunny, I know your next. God has a baby for you too, and trust me, when it happens all the needles, and tests, and tears, will be a horrible memory. I never could have got this far without you guys......



ok hormones are taking over and I am all teary now. I just want you to know that I think about you both, always!

P.S. this is a random side thought that I wanted to share: I met a girl the other day who is getting a referral to the fs, and I felt soooo sad for her. We ended up talking forever, and know what she said to me? You give me hope. I was full of so much bitterness when dealing with IF that her words really touched me.